Is Fear the Real Meaning of Stress?
Someone recently turned me on to a great podcast from the Ologies archive called Fearology. Yep, it’s a real word and a real field of study. In the podcast, fearologist Mary Poffenroth basically equates what we call “stress” with fear. She posits that there are just 2 basic types of fear: fear of not being enough and fear of losing control. A lot of this makes great sense! While I don’t entirely agree with her equating the 2 terms - because I still think that “stress” in anything that causes the body to need to change and adapt, which can be something as emotionally neutral as a change in the ambient room temperature - I do agree that when most people are talking about how “stressed out” they are, they are, indeed, almost always talking about how afraid they are on some level. It’s not socially acceptable (much) to talk about how afraid we are, but it’s totally OK to say that we are stressed. Once we do recognize the feeling as a flavor of fear, though, it does make for a fresh understanding and open us up to a new set of tools for coping with it! If you listen to the Fearology podcast - there is a part 2 here - you can learn some great new skills for recognizing and neutralizing many of your imaginary fears. (spoiler alert: almost all of your fears are imaginary.) In the podcast, Poffenroth also does a great job of laying out how being in a constant state of fear (or what we could call a constant state of stress) easily contributes to the chronic digestive trouble that so many people these days are having. Indeed, why wouldn’t we be having digestive problems if a key part of the fight/flight response is to decrease energy and attention to the digestive system while increasing blood flow, power, etc. to the skeletal muscles in preparation for fighting or running away? I know that everyone just wants to take a pill or the right supplements to make it all right in their bodies - hey you and me both! - but the foundational truth that seems to come up time and again is that if we don’t get this most primal of all instincts - the drive to survive! - under control and relaxed, it hardly matters which supplements we are swallowing! Our guts are not able to make the best use of them while in a state of fear. The recognition of most of our stress as manifestations of fear makes NET an even more important component of a healthy lifestyle. There’s a lot that you can do on your own to manage your fears and anxieties, and a mental health professional is important when the fear and anxiety are heading towards the pathological zone. And/but in my experience, there’s nothing quite like a skilled NET practitioner to pull the mindbody components together! Check out the NET Practitioner Finder to locate a certified NET practitioner near you, and if there is nobody near you, then shoot me an e-mail to set up a free telemedicine consultation to see if you might be a candidate for distance assisted FAST. It’s OK to be afraid. Just not all the time. Be safe out there!
-DK