I Will Never Bullshit You

I love science. I love the latest and the greatest! I love spooky things and mysterious things, too. Why not? But above all, I love TRUE things. And therefore, I’m not a fan of deception, otherwise known as bullshit. I don’t like to be bullshitted, and thereofore, I don’t like to bullshit other people.

Why do I bring this up today?

Well, I was thinking about some new health products out there. And, for the record, I’m NOT saying that the purveyors of these products and services are being bullshitters. They may genuinely and sincerely believe that what they are offering is revolutionary and can make you live to 125! I dunno! 🤷🏻‍♂️

Like… what if you could take a simple blood test and have your DNA analyzed such that you could be prescribed the perfect diet, supplement cocktail, and even exercise regimen for optimal health? Wouldn’t that be amazing?? Boy oh boy, if you had that, wouldn’t you be the healthiest person ever? Life would be damn near perfect. IF ONLY THERE WERE SUCH A THING! What would it be worth to you? The price would be so worth it! Imagine… practically a guarantee of great health…!

I know, I know, over the years, many people have claimed to have found THE true keys to perfect health and longevity, but that was the OLD days - what did THEY know? THESE people NOW - THIS is the REAL DEAL! If I follow them, I’m going to live to 125!

But… friend, I’m telling you… even if you did know the 100% perfect diet and exercise regimen, you wouldn't stick with it forever. Why not?! Because! You. Are. Human. Womp womp.

I speak from human experience.

A long time ago - almost exactly 30 years ago - I had my first experience with functional medicine. I was always tired, headachey and mentally cloudy. So I went to this functional medicine doctor. He was pricey, but everyone said he was worth it. And you know what? He was worth it! He pinpointed my problem, put me on a special diet, gave me some specific supplements, and voila. After just a couple of weeks (after the painful detox process), I felt great! Why would I EVER eat sugar wheat or dairy again!? Why would I EVER stop drinking enough water every day? I felt amazing! Life was perfect! Done and done!

And yet…

Over and over through the years, I would run into cycles of health and dis-ease, and then checking out the latest and greatest more specific methods of seeking health solutions, and… guess what? Nothing sticks forever. Not because the solutions don’t work. In fact, the solutions almost always end up being slight variations on the same thing! Drink enough water! Cut the sugar! Eat more green things! Cut the [American] wheat and dairy! Exercise! Rest! Reduce stress! Love! Breathe!

The human animal hasn’t changed much over the millennia!

The same things that help and hurt it still help and hurt it — and will, for the foreseeable future!

The biggest hurdles to health are the various faces of our own humanity. To navigate that is a lifelong process without any final endpoint until THE end. Once you solve a problem, you will find another problem in need of solving. This is just the human condition. No biggie!

And no matter what, you’re not going to live to 125. Only about 1.5% of us will even live to 100. And even if you do, it might not be that great! When my Gramma turned 92, she said, “It’s not that great. All your friends are dead and people treat you like furniture.”

So… why bother?!

Because!

Despite it all, life is special, and life is precious, and it’s worth living it well. For all I know, I might only make it to 63. But based on my health choices, I could make it there with headaches, back pain and suicidal ideation, or I could make it there feeling relatively spry and jolly (albeit with a dark and dry flavor of jollity).

And that is what I want for all of you - whether or not we ever work together! I want for you to live out your remaining lifetime in the best possible state! I’m happy to play the role of trusty guide on the next leg of your human journey. And I will not judge you, and I will never bullshit you.

And that is pretty much all I have to say about that!

-DK